Guarding Our Hearts

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Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life. ~Proverbs 4:23

We all are vulnerable to influences and actions that turn our hearts from goodness and purity. Some come from inside ourselves, and others from outside: keeping bad company, reading newspapers or magazines, a favorite TV show, daydreaming, certain kinds of music, joking around, gossip, cursing, complaining, overeating, arguing, boasting, etc.

Perhaps as you read this, you know what it is that attacks the purity of your heart. Don’t play with this fire. Accept the wisdom of God and turn from that impurity. Remember, the Lord is a refuge. He is the Source of Life.

Our Father in Heaven says be careful, watch over your heart, and be diligent in this. For your heart is the source of who you are. The things that flow from your heart affect your relationship with your Creator and affect the people you love.

The Lord wants us to be pure because He loves us, and because He loves those around us. He wants to bless others through us, and we can prepare ourselves for service by guarding our hearts.

Life flows from your heart, the life that is a blessing to others and is so precious to God.

Good Cheer

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As we go through every day working and doing things need to be done, it is very easy to loose our focus on God. It is very easy to just think about our daily routine. And the sad thing is that this daily routine is often very depressing. There is a spirit of death over Russia. In some places it is strong, some places not.

But facing the obstacles and hard choices sometimes makes us very upset and demoralized. I find myself complaining and wishing things were different. I find that I need to be comforted and told that everything is going to be ok. But the Lord is not always saying that. He said we would have tribulations. And He said to be of good cheer.

But how do we get this good cheer? How do we face the difficulties with courage and faith? The Lord does not just come into our lives with a magic wand and make all things perfect. He asks us to seek Him even when it seems we have no strength left. Even when we are about to give up, He calls us to seek Him.

But He does not promise us it would be easy. A lot of times, if we want to find Him as He is, it will cost us. I am just saying it because I face it. The Lord asks me to seek Him with all of my heart. Not to look at the gloomy sky in the morning, not to look at the despair you feel when things don’t fall into place, not to listen to people who say you cannot do it. He says to seek Him, look at Him, run after Him, chase Him. How many times have I failed trying to do it? How many times I asked God to forgive me for not getting up early enough to pray.

He forgives. He listens. He understands. He comes down to help us. But the ultimate thing He asks from us is to seek Him. Not matter how hard, no matter how long. Seek Him. And that is what I wish I could accomplish through my life.

Magic

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A while ago, I read two of the Harry Potter stories by J. K. Rowling. This series of books is very popular, and I was interested to see why people enjoy them so much. Rowling is a very good writer, and I found myself quite caught up in the world she has created. The characters are engaging, and the plots kept me interested to see the outcomes of the stories.

There has been some controversy over certain aspects of the books. Primarily, people are concerned that they may be taken as an endorsement of witchcraft: that witches and warlocks would be seen favorably and then embraced in our “real world” society. As I’ve thought about it, I began to see some other issues that catch my attention.

First, and briefly, I’m concerned about the way Harry and his friends constantly lie to people, even those to whom they are closest. All through the books, Harry and other characters freely lie to their mentors, parents and teachers. I don’t know why people would see this as acceptable or even desirable behavior, but Rowling presents these lies as being necessary and good, evidence of quick thinking and resourcefulness. I hope parents will talk about this with their children; in this way the books encourage children to lie. It really is bad form to encourage such behavior.

The primary drawback of these books, in my view, is that they speak from a worldview that is quite different from the way Jesus taught about the world. Harry Potter functions in a world where saying the right incantations will bring the right result. One must learn to say the right thing in the right way; paranormal, supernatural, events result from following a strict set of rules—mixing potions and casting spells being the primary examples of this. Any deviation from speaking, or doing, the correct formula will lead to a wrong result. This is a legalistic life.

The life of a follower of Jesus should be quite different. God does not call people to blindly follow a set of instructions in order to have a good and interesting life; He wants us to know Him and abide with Him. The path to true life is one of relationship with the living God, not learning a complex set of rules and applying them correctly. This is most important, because many religious leaders do not teach this distinction. Rather than merely trying to learn God’s rules, we are called to daily lay down our lives and seek the will of the Father, who loves us and lives with us. God is a God of grace and mercy, we can not manipulate His will; if we pray according to His will, miraculous things will happen, but we must seek and find His will and not our own, and this is done in relationship with Him.

We must learn the truth about how God wants us to relate to Him; we must have correct doctrine, and this true teaching will lead us to live as Jesus lived: loving and walking with our Father daily; hearing His voice and doing His will, not our own; serving when we want to be served; choosing to be the very least of all; living a life of love and self-sacrifice; calling others to do the same. The goal of true teaching is Love, coming from a sincere faith, a pure heart, and a good conscience.

As I read the Harry Potter books, I found myself wanting to be able to manipulate the world as he does: turning mice into slippers, casting spells of forgetfulness, using a wand to disarm my enemies, etc. Some of these things seem innocent enough, but all flow from a worldview that says “I can and will change reality according to my will. I am powerful when I harness the power of creation and make it bend to my will. I know what is best.” This is pure pride, even when done for “good” reasons. Jesus teaches the opposite: we surrender our power, we let go of our own will, and we allow the love and power of God to flow through us as blessing to other people—even our enemies. Harry never acts in this way; it’s foreign to him.

Let us not live by thinking we can merely say the right words in order to change the world around us, to make reality conform to our sense of what is best. The kingdom of God is very different: love is the foundation; service and humility are necessary; we should not attempt to manipulate or control the world, but rather we are to serve God and lay down our lives for Christ’s sake; the greatest shall be last and servant of all.

Travel Tips

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I thought I’d keep adding to a list of things I’m learning about how to prepare for travel here in Russia.  I hope it helps.

  • When flying: drink lots of water; this dramatically helps my jet-jag recovery time.  Taking Melatonin at the start of the flight helps me, but it doesn’t have the same effect for everyone.  Wear comfortable shoes and clothes. Bring lip balm–it’s very dry in a plane.  Bring ear plugs–many airlines offer them, but bring some just in case.
  • Travel/camp towels are great (I got mine at REI).  They are super absorbent, pack into a small space, and dry quickly.  Get a large one.
  • Speaking of: bring quick-drying clothing.  Nylon is good, cotton is not.  I’ve done a lot of laundry in a sink, and it helps to have things that dry fast (I’ve learned this the hard way).  Also, you might get caught in a rainstorm and want to dry out quickly.
  • Bring a small calculator–you’ll be able to figure out the money exchange rate when buying at the market.
  • Pack light.  This will leave more room for supplies for the kids.
  • Check with your airline to see what the weight limit is per piece of luggage.  Also get them to allow one or two extra checked bags per person–tell them what you’re doing and keep moving up the chain of command if you’re told you can’t get free or reduced rates.
  • Pack a change of clothes and toiletries in your carry-on; it’s common to have checked bags get delayed, and you’ll want to freshen up after the trip.
  • Bring new or very clean $20 bills or larger denominations.  It’s hard to change dirty, wrinkled, or old bills here; there should be no writing or discoloration.  Ask for sequentially numbered bills at your bank.
  • Money belts that go under your clothing work well; I usually use a leg wallet.  Find a hidden compartment on your luggage to put your money there when you get to Russia.
  • Things I think you should definitely bring: camera, bug juice, a hat, a team medical kit, some clothes detergent, vitamins, water-proof shoes, good socks (get hiking socks at an camping supply store), shampoo, tooth brush and paste, floss, deodorant, layers of clothing, a water-proof wind breaker, a warm shirt, a small flashlight, a notebook and pens, an easy-going disposition, a decent watch, a travel clock with new batteries, hand sanitizer, toilet paper (get the small travel rolls at Wal-Mart), maybe a team water purifier if you’re staying in a camp (you’ll be able to buy water, but it’s good to have a small unit; I have one called First Need), transformer and adapters if needed (it’s 220 volts here, and the outlets are different), a self-less heart and dependence on God.
  • Things to leave at home: bulky towels and coats, fancy clothes, anything of great value, vanity (now that I think about it, don’t even keep this at home; it’s too much trouble).
  • Good gifts to bring for new friends: American flags, stuffed animals, pocket knives, toiletry kits, perfume, nice soaps, toothbrushes and toothpaste, pictures of your home state, coffee mugs with a cool logo, ball caps, coffee (for adults), sweets (for me), small toys, colorful stickers, school supplies.
  • Bring a picture album of your family and friends in America–but be careful not have pictures of your house or valuable items; kids here can feel really bad if they compare their life with yours in these areas.  So, talk about relationships and activities, not about what you own.
  • Buy a Berlitz Russian Phrase Book and Dictionary (ISBN #2-8315-6238-4).  Invaluable when trying to pick up some of the language or talk with kids.
  • Remember, as a follower of Christ, your life is not your own. Since the Lord has called you to minister here, He will provide what you need when you need it.

Thoughts about ministry in Russia

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Here are some thoughts to help you prepare for ministry in Russia.

Throughout the past 2000 years, Christians have been going abroad to share the gospel of Christ.  Prepare yourself for service by practicing self-discipline. Your trip to Russia is not a vacation, it’s a vocation–call from the Lord to be a blessing to those He loves very much.  Be prepared to serve, not be served. Be willing to be the very last, and servant of all.  Of course, when you do this, you will have abundant life–a life of love, peace and strength.

Pray often and submit your spirit to the Lord.  You will be sharing in the work He is already doing.  Don’t assume that you’re making your own decisions–follow the Lord.  His will will be done.

Remember, as a follower of Christ, your life is not your own.  Since the Lord has called you to minister here, He will provide what you need when you need it.  He is a loving Father who knows what you need before you ask.  This will be an opportunity to learn this lesson deeply, if you’re willing to die to yourself.  If you’re not willing to die to yourself, consider whether or not you’re a disciple of Christ, because selflessness is necessary to being a Christian.  My experience is that we learn this more and more as we walk with the Lord.

Pray to learn contentment in every situation; ask for wisdom and faith.  These things are gifts from God that will be needed here.  I find myself using the word “learn” often as I write this.  To be a learner is the definition of a disciple.  You won’t come here with all the answers or be prepared for all that will happen.  You will come dependent on God to light your path one step at a time; “each day has enough trouble of it’s own,” so don’t be anxious for tomorrow.

If you feel overwhelmed or weary, remember that the Lord is your Good Shepherd; He will lead you through the hard times.  Also, tell your team members when you’re tired and ask them to pray for you.  Be transparent, vulnerable, human.

The Kingdom of God is not America.  Be careful not to associate American ideals with Godly wisdom. They overlap at times, but they are not the same.  Speak what the Bible speaks, and be silent when it is silent.  Show love and mercy to all who cross your path.  The Kingdom of God is much larger and more diverse than the USA, or Russia, or any other country.  Point everyone toward God the Father through Christ the Son.

Be encouraged. God is Love. Jesus did not come to condemn; He came to save!

Paulina

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[originally posted in 2001]

I met Paulina during the summer of 2000 in one of the non-ambulatory wards at the children’s home in Pavlovsk. She is ten years old, with severe cataracts–as far as I can tell she can see when the light changes but can not see any distinct forms. She does not speak; she does not walk; she is not able to bathe or feed herself.

When I first saw her, she was sleeping, all curled up with her arms over her face–closed to the world. I sat next to her and began to play the guitar. She heard the music and was at first unsure how to respond, then she broke into a very large smile and stretched her body out in a very graceful way. I think she would have been a ballerina if she did not have her disabilities. Her response to the music was wonderful to see. Then, she reached out to me and pulled my hand toward her and held it against her chest for a long time. It was an honor and a pleasure to pray for her as she held my hand. I prayed for her spirit to be at peace, I prayed blessing on her. I prayed that she would be great in the kingdom of heaven, since she is so “low” here on earth. That is the way God has built creation: those who are last shall be first.

I went back to visit her at every opportunity. The second time I played for her, I moved the guitar so that it touched her body–this allowed her to feel the resonance of the instrument. She reached out to the guitar and held on to the instrument to feel, as well as hear, the music. God has given me comfort through this music, and I know He also comforted Paulina as I played. Even though we don’t share a language, and she can’t see my face, the music connected us–two people connected by a gift of God. This is a very holy thing.

The Austin team has provided supplies to help her as she lives in the orphanage, but just as important is our being there to serve her through human contact, by loving her. The workers there do the best they can–they obviously care for the kids, but the work is overwhelming for them, and they can not give each child the attention a person needs; we are called to love them with the love of God.

Paulina is one of 140 children in the non-ambulatory wards at the orphanage. Please pray for her.

Update: I visited Paulina three years after first seeing her. She is growing!! The nurses at the orphanage say that she loves music! She is blind and does not speak, but at least she is now able to sit in a chair and move some. When I first met her, she was bedridden. I’m not sure how much she can understand around her. Both of her grandmothers visit her, but her parents now live in New York–they’ve abandoned her because of her disabilities. To think that she’s been in this orphanage since she was a baby, and she’ll be here until she turns 18 and is sent to an adult facility.